by Amber Palmer
The desert landscape unfolded before me as the sun peeked up over the horizon. We rode through a cloud of dust to the constant rhythm of my horse’s gait as my head nodded against my chest. It’d been a long ride, a lot longer than usual, without finding a town to stay in. It was a shame really to see so many abandoned towns and cities, now serving as expensive headstones for humanity.
It was the cities that fell first. Close proximity makes infection all the easier to spread, but even rural areas weren’t safe when the animals got infected too. Those of us who survived those first few months kept waiting for someone to restore order, for a vaccine to come out and this disease to fall into obscurity, but as months rolled into years, we stopped waiting. No one was coming with a magic wand to fix everything.
I reached behind me to adjust my tried and true shotgun that’d been rubbing me wrong as the shadows of several buildings came into view. It looked like nothing to be excited over, just a cluster of houses that probably made up a small development before humanity fell, but there was one promising detail: they had a fence.
As I approached the fence, all I could think of was the prospect of water and food. Other than the sparse supplies I’d scrounged up as I looted the empty towns, mostly everything had been picked over. Even jewels and electronics were taken, but only God knows why, since none of that stuff meant anything anymore.
“Halt,” a voice called from the fence. I pulled my horse back and raised my head to look at the man stationed at the top of the wooden fence. Getting closer to it made me realize the fence must be just for false security because it looked like a gentle breeze could knock the rickety thing over.
“Not lookin’ for trouble,” I said, clearing the sleep out of my voice. “I’m just lookin’ to trade. I’ve got some supplies, some furs. All I’m lookin’ for is some water and a place for the night.”
“Who’s with you?” the voice asked.
“Nobody. Just me and Ruby here,” I answered, patting my horse. The man hesitated before climbing down from his post and unlatching the fence. The sweet relief of seeing houses, even if they were in states of disrepair, made my knees weak. Some folks had running water and electricity, and I couldn’t help but pray that I’d hit the jackpot and found one of those towns.
“Hey, Mister,” the man said, making me stop.
“Missus,” I answered, swinging my legs off my horse and sliding down. The man looked me up and down before getting flustered.
“Oh, sorry, Missus. If you’re looking for a place to lay your head, Father Williams keeps the church open for drifters,” the man said, pointing to one of the homes at the end of the straight street.
“Is this the whole neighborhood?” I asked, counting ten of them. They weren’t small houses, that’s for sure, but it seemed strange that a string of ten houses would be by itself out here in the desert.
“Yes ma’am. According to Elsie, she lived here before everything happened, this plot of land was owned by the Tuckers, some rich family. Guess the mama wanted houses for her and her family, so they could all live together,” he answered, tucking his thumbs into his belt loops as we looked over the town. “Not all the houses are finished, but they’re better than nothing.”
“Oh I’m not complainin’, I was just wonderin’,” I said quickly as I took Ruby by her lead and started down the dirt road. “Thank you for openin’ the gate.”
“Now wait just a second,” he said, leaving the gate to swing as he ran over to me. “You got any weapons?”
“Course I do. How else do you think I’m standin’ here?” I asked.
“I’m gonna need it then,” he said, holding his hand out. “Can’t just let anyone wander in here with a gun.”
“Fair enough,” I said nervously as I reached around to hand him my shotgun and into my holster to give him my pistol. I felt naked without any sort of protection, but, at the same time, I couldn’t help but feel safer in this town. If no one had weapons, why would I need them? “Now I best be going. Thank you again.”
“No problem. Just don’t make me regret it,” he answered as he latched the gate and took his place at his post again.
The town was still asleep as I walked through. Each of the suburban homes were labeled, either with shop names or with resident names with white paint that they probably found in one of the half built homes. The last two homes in the stretch were the town jail/town hall and Father Williams’ Methodist Church. The home they picked for the church was oddly appropriate, being it was in a Victorian style with the pointed roof and circular room. They’d even painted the windows to look like stained glass.
“I’ll be back girl, hopefully with water,” I said to Ruby as I tied her to what used to be a mailbox. Just as the man had said, the door to the church was unlocked. I felt like I was intruding into a home as I nudged it open and peeked into the dark house.
“Hello?” I called as I wandered from the entrance room and into what must be their sanctuary. There were pews that looked like they were built from extra wood, probably from the houses in construction, and a music stand with fabric draped on it to make it resemble a pulpit.
“Hello Child,” a voice said from behind me. I turned quickly to see who I’d assumed was Father Williams standing there in white priest robes.
“Hi there. I was told you had a place to stay for a night,” I said, for once not feeling threatened by the presence of a stranger. There was something about his soft features and the way that he was hunched over that reminded me a lot of my granddad.
“Of course. My church is open to all. Just follow me,” he said, gesturing for me with his hand as we walked from the sanctuary and back to the entrance room. He slowly started up a set of stairs that seemed a little too steep for an old guy to be taking, but I followed behind him, getting ready to catch. “What should I call you, my dear?”
“Sadie,” I answered. “Do y’all happen to have water?”
“We do,” he said proudly. “I’ll get you a pitcher once we get you settled.”
“Can my horse have some too?” I asked, feeling almost like a child for asking, but Ruby was my wheels. I needed her if I was going to make it past this place.
“We have plenty. You can even shower and wash your clothes, if you’d like,” he said with a smile as we made it up the stairs and started down the small hall. He stopped at a door, unlocked it and gestured into it. “Would this suit you?”
The powder blue room was a traveler’s dream. There was a bed with a thin quilt, a table with a basin to get washed up at, and a window that let in a nice cool breeze. Above the bed was a painting of Jesus looking up to heaven.
“This is perfect, thank you,” I answered, resisting the urge to throw myself on the bed.
“I’m glad to hear it. Help yourself to the shower. It’s in the room next to yours. Would you like me to find you some clothes to wear while yours are washed?” he asked, overwhelming me with his hospitability. I shook my head, surprised by a lump in my throat that kept me from properly thanking him.
There’s no way to describe exactly how it feels to shower after going without for months. You just never feel clean bathing in a lake or a river. I couldn’t remember feeling this clean as I towel dried my chopped brown hair and brushed my teeth with a pink toothbrush that was left out for me. It was hard to look in the mirror at myself as I brushed. My skin was a worn leather from the elements I’d ridden through and all the things I’d seen. I could see my mother more than myself in my green eyes and thin eyebrows. I didn’t know what she or my dad or my sister would think about the life I’d made for myself, but they died so early on, I doubt they’d understand the world we live in now.
When I went back into my room, I wasn’t alone. A girl no older than me was there, taking my jeans and black tank top and putting them in a basket. She’d already laid out some new clothes for me in a much lighter palette.
“Oh, hello there,” she said as she turned around and almost ran into me. Her strawberry blonde hair almost had a life of its own as it bounced back, just as startled as she was.
“Hi,” I said back, suddenly extremely self-conscious about standing there in a towel. She had the warmest blue eyes I’d ever seen. I’d never seen blue eyes that weren’t piercing or serious in some way, but hers sang a carefree laugh as her pink lips curved into a smile.
“My name’s Ann-Marie,” she offered her hand, only to remember that I was holding a towel up.
“Sadie,” I said with a nod. “If ya don’t mind, I gotta—”
“Oh, sorry,” she said, her pale face turning pink as she tried to get through the doorway. “See you later Sadie.”
“God willing,” I said back as I closed the door and got dressed.
It’d been a long time since I felt like that. It wasn’t often that I saw people in general, but eye candy like that was a rarity. The last thing I needed was to chase tail in the one day I was here, so, instead of going out into the town that was just waking up, I laid down in bed, watching Ann-Marie and other women scrubbing clothes in metal tubs. Through my window, I could see most of the town, and as the women washed away the grime in the yard next to the church, I dozed into sleep.
#
I woke up with a jolt a few hours later. I couldn’t help but panic as I tried to remember where I was exactly. I immediately reached for my gun, but as soon as my eyes fell on the floral-patterned shirt I’d been given, it all came together. I took a deep breath, crawled out of bed and grabbed my pack from the floor. The town had come to life as people gathered in groups and chatted, women hung clothes to dry and men worked the gardens that the backyards of the houses had been turned into. It was almost shocking to see actual children playing ball in the street, laughing and screeching in delight.
“Sadie! Over here!” Ann-Marie called, her white sun dress swaying with her hips as she jumped on her tip toes to get my attention. Like the idiot I was, I waved back and walked over to her.
“Hi there Ann-Marie,” I said as I got closer to her.
“Have a nice rest?” she asked. “I watered your horse for ya. She’s in the garage of the church.”
“Yeah, thanks. That was awfully nice of you,” I answered, but all I could think was stop, stop, don’t even think about it.
“Don’t mention it. So what brings you to Andersontown?” she asked, leaning against one of the houses.
“That’s what this place is called?” I asked, trying not to laugh at the mouthful.
“Yeah, my dad figured if we’re making a town, might as well name it after us,” she answered, raising an eyebrow at me.
“Oh, oh, I’m sorry. Your father’s the mayor then?” I asked.
“Mayor and constable,” she said with a smile. “He really believes in this place. Thinks maybe we can make some sorta life here.”
“Well, it certainly is a dream here, compared to out there,” I said.
“Then why don’t you stay?” she asked, a tint of hope gleaming in her eyes. I shook my head, as much as it hurt to see that gleam go.
“Can’t stay in one place too long. Just not who I am,” I said quickly as I started to walk away. I already was getting restless here, as much as I liked the view of Ann-Marie and a bed. It couldn’t be the morning soon enough.
“Wait, Sadie,” she called over to me. I stopped but didn’t turn around. “On Friday nights, we have a dance in the general store. You wanna come?”
“It’s Friday?” I asked. “Um, sure Ann-Marie. We’ll see.”
“Wait!” she yelled as I started off again. “Where you going?”
“I came here to get supplies, so I figure if I’m leavin’ tomorrow, I better trade now,” I answered, gesturing to the handful of skins I had by the tail.
“Oh,” she said, biting her lip. “Mind if I tag along? I got some groceries to get.”
#
The name General Store was pretty loose when it came to town. There wasn’t any person manning a counter, selling wares like you’d think, but a bunch of people, flea market style, bartering with each other. I was expecting a record-screech entrance, but Ann-Marie and I drifted through the crowded room that stunk of sweat without drawing much attention at all.
“I was wondering when I’d see you again!” the guard said from behind his own table. “Nice duds.”
“Yeah, well, floral pattern isn’t normally my thing, but I don’t turn down charity,” I said quickly as I looked at his goods. It was pretty run-of-the-mill, some water containers and canned foods, exactly what I needed. “How about two raccoons for…hmm, three cans and a gallon of water.”
“Well…sure,” he said after a minute. I couldn’t help but chortle as he pulled out one of those recyclable terrycloth bags that people were convinced would save the environment. “And look, you get a free bag out of it.” He paused, like he had something else to say, as he held the bag out to me. “You know, you’re the first lady I’ve seen who’s ballsy enough to bag some furs.”
“Only the small ones. Anything bigger than a cat isn’t worth the trouble. Cause of the infestation, even deer are rabid,” I said, trying to shrug it off as nothing. “It was nice seein’ you again—”
“Jake,” he answered as Ann-Marie came up to me.
“Great, Jake,” I acknowledged as I approached the man across the room. It wasn’t like I was trying to get away from Jake, I liked him well enough, but there was something on this man’s table that I’d been looking for ever since I’d gotten to the desert. The black men’s brimmed hat sat unassumingly next to a black cotton jacket amongst supplies that’d probably be more useful to me. Ann-Marie must’ve noticed me ogling it.
“You like that?” she asked, picking it up for closer inspection.
“I mean…sure I do, but I don’t need it,” I answered, knowing that the man behind the table would probably want the rest of my supplies for it.
“That’s alright anyway. Those are men’s clothes,” the man behind the table said as he looked me up and down. “And you are most definitely a woman.”
“Didn’t know that clothes had a sex, but thank you for the education,” I grumbled at him as I took the hat from Ann-Marie and put it back on the table.
“I’ll take it. And the jacket,” Ann-Marie said, her hands on her waist like a disobedient child.
“For Ted, right?” the man asked. “Besides, you don’t got anything to trade.”
“Of course it’s for Ted. Just put it on our tab, you know we’re good for it,” she said as she gathered up the hat and the jacket. She gave me a sly wink as she turned around.
“Nice doing business with ya, Ann-Marie. See you both at the dance tonight,” he said, although his tone said something completely different. Ann-Marie rolled her eyes as we walked out, putting the hat on my head as soon as we hit the door.
“It suits you,” she said with a smile as she handed me the jacket. I slid it on, amazed that it felt like fabric softener had actually been used on it. “The jacket though…. Maybe it’ll look better with your clothes.”
#
My day had consisted of trading and getting acquainted with the ways of the town. It was amazing and unnerving how they had managed to actually pull together some sort of semblance of society, where each person had a job and a place. I didn’t want to stay much longer, but Ann-Marie insisted on me going to this dance, and how could I say no to that face?
It felt silly to walk into the general store and see all of these people dancing together to a woman playing the guitar and singing badly. I was thankful to have the jacket and hat Ann-Marie got me to help me hide a little, but the whole idea of a party was so far gone from my mind that I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to be acting.
As my eyes drifted through the crowd of people, they caught on Ann-Marie as she danced with some muscly monster of a man that I could only assume was Ted. His t-shirt actually looked in pain as it strained against his arms with each twirl. Her eyes caught my gaze and she slid out of his grasp and navigated the crowd to me.
“Sadie, you made it!” she said excitedly as she took my hands and led me onto the dancefloor. A song that I’d recognize in an instant began. My mind placed the absent horns into their proper place as the woman sang.
“Love is a burning thing and it makes a fiery ring. Bound by wild desire. I fell into a ring of fire,” she sang as Ann-Marie and I danced. I could feel Ted’s eyes on me, but I tried my best to ignore them and just enjoy twirling her. Her hair smelled sweet as it danced through the air.
“Who’s that guy?” I asked as I pulled her back into a dance that would be worthy of a middle school gymnasium.
“Oh Ted? He’s just…. He’s just a guy,” she said, but it was obvious he was more than just “a guy,” judging by them having a tab together. I knew it was a long shot, but I couldn’t help being a little disappointed.
We danced through the song, but with each move I got more and more nervous about Ted’s eyes following us around the room. As soon as it ended, I dropped her hands and took a step back.
“Sorry, I just think that maybe this isn’t the place for me,” I said as I turned to leave, but as I did so, Jake blocked the way, looping his arm in mine.
“I’m gonna steal you for a dance,” he said gently, pulling me in as a slow song started.
“Whoa, uh, I mean,” I stuttered as we moved further and further away from the door. My eyes bounced around the scene of all of the couples as he spun me. I couldn’t help but notice them all staring at us, whispering and pointing like we’re some sort of freak show. As much as I wanted to avoid his eyes, watching the people around us wasn’t any better. “Listen…can we not?”
“What?” he asked as I finally met his eyes.
“I don’t…. Uh…I don’t swing that way,” I said, watching shock instantly come over his face. I expected him to stop dancing with me, to move on to the few other girls in the room, but he kept on without missing a beat.
“Can I offer you some advice?” he asked, pulling me a little closer than I was comfortable with. I gritted my teeth as I resisted stomping his toe. “Don’t let them know…. You don’t even want to know what happened to the last one.”
“What do you mean?” I asked, taking lead and pushing him away with the hand I had on his shoulder. Before he could answer, through the noise of the dance and the music, I could hear the sound. A screeching sound that twisted my innards and sent pins down my spine. I pushed away from him and ran out the door before anyone had even heard it.
Half the dance emptied out behind me as we went into the street and saw one of them. They weren’t always humans, actually, normally they were animals. Wolves, raccoons, bears, lots of dogs. Most of the humans who got it died, but occasionally we’d find new ones, freshly infected by what could only be described as rabies on steroids. It did something that science didn’t have time to figure out as it spread like wildfire through the country. Whatever it was, it made people into monsters, sometimes eating chunks of flesh out of their own bodies as foam leaked from their mouths.
This one was no different. It was barely human with its cheeks completely devoured from its face. It stood there, gnawing on its own arm before it turned and noticed us. You could never tell if it’d be the docile kind, or the aggressive kind, but you never waited to find out.
“What should we do?” Ann-Marie asked. I shushed her instantly as its eyes stared us down. I reached for my pockets to pull out my pistol, only to remember that I wasn’t wearing my clothes.
“Anyone have a gun?” I asked, only to receive blank stares. Why they thought it was smart to have no one guarding the gate, I will never know, but I didn’t have time to think about it before I discovered it was an aggressive one.
In a flash it was on us, charging at Ann-Marie, a trail of blood following it towards her. It was mass hysteria as people screamed and ran to their homes, but she just stood there, paralyzed in fear as what was left of its tongue hung out of its mouth like an excited dog. My instincts kicked in, making me body check the thing, sending us both to the ground. I tried my best to hold it at arm’s length as it swatted at me, its teeth chattering at the anticipation of my flesh.
“Somebody get a damn gun!” I yelled, waking up Ann-Marie from her frozen state and sending her off somewhere. I could feel my arms buckling under its inhuman strength as its blood got all over my face. All of the cleanliness that I had gained back vanished as I remembered my sister in the same situation, her arms caving in as the monster that had been my mother chewed through her neck and gouged her eyes out onto her fingers. I felt what I’d imagine she had felt. That release, the knowing that I couldn’t hold on anymore. And as soon as I felt that, I felt an acidic burning in my left arm as its overgrown nails dug into it, piercing skin and muscle as it tried to scoop out a piece like a melon. And with a bang, it stopped.
I dropped it instantly. All I could feel was its bare teeth on my neck and an overwhelming pain in my arm before I passed out.
#
“I think she’s waking up,” I heard Ann-Marie say. “Daddy, she’s getting up.”
I blinked through the blurriness of my mind to see three faces a little too close to me. I went to reach for my gun, only to find that not only did I still not have it on me, but I was in some sort of nightgown that my grandma would wear. All I could think of was pain.
“You had us scared Sadie,” Father Williams said as my panic subsided. I looked down at my arm that was all bundled up in cotton cloth, and then it all came back.
“I wasn’t bit, was I?” I asked quickly. “Cause if I was bit, just chop the damned thing off.”
“No, you weren’t. You’re okay now,” Ann-Marie said, putting a hand on my shoulder. “Sadie, this is my daddy.”
Mr. Anderson was a robust gentleman who looked like a southern dandy in a white, almost spotless suit and a bolo tie. His neckless head was a bright red, only made more noticeable by his bleach white moustache.
“I just wanted to thank you for what you did for Annie here. It took some guts, and I appreciate it,” he said with a smile hiding under his moustache.
“Don’t mention it,” I said.
“No, what you did…not everyone would’ve done that. And for that, we want to offer you a place to live, the chance to make Andersontown your home,” he said. There was something about his tone that made me feel like this was less of an offer and more of a command.
“I…uh, appreciate it, but I’ll probably be headin’ out, soon as I can,” I said as I sat up in bed. “I’ve already lost a day.”
“A day? You’ve lost much more than that,” Father Williams said with surprise. “Sadie, you’ve been out for three days.”
“Three days? Holy shit, I gotta go,” I said, pulling the blankets off with my good arm and swinging my legs over the bed. Father Williams and Mr. Anderson both reached out and pressed me back into it.
“We’ll have none of that. At least stay till you’re healed up,” Mr. Anderson insisted. “We’ll leave you in Annie’s capable hands.”
With an offer like that, how could I say no?
#
As days turned into weeks, I became more and more restless. When Ann-Marie would go fix us some dinner, I’d get up and pace the length of the room like a caged animal, watching the desert that laid out beyond the fence like it’d disappear if I didn’t watch it. As antsy as I was getting, I didn’t regret what I did. Every time she’d smile or we’d talk, I knew I had done the right thing. And with each word and each moment, I became more and more smitten.
“Bed time,” Ann-Marie said in a sing song voice as she came back into the room with a fresh basin of water. “I just checked on Ruby for you and she’s doing fine. Father Williams’ heart might break when you take her though.”
“When do you reckon that’ll be?” I asked, turning away from the window and back to her.
“Welp, let’s check huh?” she said as she sat on my bed, patting the spot next to her. I sighed, wandering over to her and flopping down on the bed. She rolled her eyes at me as I handed her my arm, knowing the drill by now. She carefully unwrapped the bandages, watching me to see if I winced, which only made me try harder to keep a straight face when it did sting. “It’s looking a lot better.”
She was right. I’d have a nasty scar down the length of my forearm, but there wasn’t any redness or swelling, so I lucked out and didn’t get an infection.
“So when’ll I be free to hit the road Nurse?” I asked as she dampened a cloth in the basin and washed my arm.
“Maybe a few more days. But what’s the hurry anyways?” she asked, looking at my arm and less at me.
“You know how it is,” was all I could think to say. It’d been the answer I was giving Father Williams and Mr. Anderson and Ann-Marie as they asked over and over again if I’d stay, and no one had bothered to question it until today.
“No…no I don’t Sadie,” Ann-Marie said with some bite. “You’re safe here. We have water, we have food, we have a wall.”
“None of that means anythin’,” I said, tugging my arm away from her and taking the bandages off the table. “Before all this, we had food and water and walls and electricity and families and jobs and television and stupid shit like that, but that’s not our world anymore. And as much as y’all like to pretend that you’re safe here, all walls come down. Either that, or someone here’ll get greedy. Food’ll run short and people won’t be all lovely-dovey, we’re a big happy family when they’re starvin’ to death—”
“Shut up!” she yelled, jumping off the bed and glaring at me. “Don’t act like you’re the only person here who knows that. We’ve all lost people, we’ve all had to live out there, but we want to make something better for ourselves. And that requires sacrifice sometimes.”
“At what cost?” I asked. She froze, her hands still wrapped around the wet washcloth that was now dripping all over the floor. “Ann, I listen. I’m not deaf. I’ve heard your daddy talking to Father Williams about me marryin’ Jake, and my birthing hips and all that weird shit. Add in the women with 6 or 7 kids a piece and you bein’ with an asshole like Ted, and it paints a pretty clear picture. And don’t you act like you don’t know what I’m talkin’ about.”
She stared at the floor, blinking back her own tears as she watched the water drip on the floor.
“Before all of this happened, what did you do?” she asked.
“Don’t matter anymore,” I said quickly.
“Maybe. I had opened my own flower shop, right before all this happened. And I figured, that’d be enough for me. I’d never have to get married or tell Daddy that I….” She stopped. “None of that matters anymore though. Daddy said it himself, it’s our job to procreate…it’d be selfish not to….”
“I’m probably in no position to say anythin’, but can I give you some advice?” I asked. I waited for her reluctant nod before even daring to continue. “I’ve been out on my own for a long long time. Longer than I’d like to admit. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that no one can make you do anythin’ you don’t wanna do.”
“What are you saying?” I she as she sat back down on the bed and finally met my gaze.
“I’m sayin’ maybe you should try doin’ what you want to do for once,” I said.
I knew I shouldn’t have kissed her, but I couldn’t help it. I expected her to pull back or smack me or run or something, but she leaned in, pressing me back into the bed with her hands. It’d been so long since I’d kissed anyone, I almost forgot what it was like to taste another person, to feel the soft pressure of lips against my own. I could’ve died here and been satisfied.
“Please stay,” she said as she pulled away. Her thumb drew circles on my cheek as she held my face in her hand.
“I can’t,” I said again, closing my eyes to take in each motion.
“Then let me come with you. Please don’t leave me here,” she pleaded, but never let me answer as she came back in for another kiss.
I like to use this as an excuse as to why I didn’t hear the distressed voices in the downstairs of the church as they came up the stairs. I didn’t hear Ted slam Father Williams against the wall to get my bedroom key, and I definitely didn’t hear the key inside the door before it was thrown open.
Ann-Marie leapt away from me and about halfway across the room as the door flew open and slammed against the wall. Ted stood there, trembling either from shock and anger.
“Ted, I’m going to have to ask you to leave,” Father Williams said with little authority as Ted pushed him away.
“I knew it. I fucking knew it.” Ted asked, grabbing me by the front of my shirt and pulling me off my feet. “Who the fuck—”
“Ted stop it!” Ann-Marie said, grabbing him by the arm. He shoved her away, slamming her against the wall and making the house shake.
“You shut the fuck up, Marie. You shut the fuck up you little lying bitch,” he screamed as his grip on me got tighter. “You said never again, but I knew when you danced with her. I knew—”
“This isn’t the way to handle this,” Father Williams said timidly as he tried to stand up straight after that much abuse.
“How else should I handle a sinner then Father?” Ted asked. I reached up to wipe his spit off my face, but that only made his hold stronger.
“A duel,” Father said. “A shootout of sorts.”
A smile spread across Ted’s face as he dropped me to the ground.
“Shootout, pistols, in ten,” he said sharply. “Come on Marie.”
“If you think I’m going anywhere with you—” she started, only to receive a glare.
“Fine, stay with your dike. See if I give a shit. You’re still my wife, and this…. Whatever this is, changes nothing,” he spat as he stormed out, stomping on each step until he left the church. As soon as we heard the door close, we all could breathe again.
“Sadie, we must pack your things and get you out of here. We’ve bought you a little time, and the last thing we should do is waste it,” Father Williams said. He took my hand and led me out of the room, Ann-Marie following close behind.
“How do you reckon I’ll do that? Won’t he see me?” I asked as we went to the garage where Ruby was resting.
“You won’t survive the shootout…. If you leave now, you could maybe go faster than his bullets,” he said as he picked up Ruby’s saddle and threw it on her back. “You do this. I’ll pack some water and food for you to take.”
“Thank you Father,” I answered as he hurried out of the room. Ann-Marie began buckling Ruby’s saddle with trembling hands. “Are you alright?”
“I’m going with you,” she said, turning away from the horse to meet my eyes. “I…I know you don’t think I understand, but I do. This time together has been…it’s been the best the happiest I’ve been since all this started years ago. And I think I could love you.”
“You don’t know me,” I said back.
“You’re right,” she said, a smile dancing on her lips. “But I will. You were right when you said this place won’t last…but you will…. We will.”
“Forget what I said Annie…. You’re safe here, at least for now,” I said.
“I’m safe here? Does Ted seem safe to you?” she said.
“He’s safer than out there is…. The truth is, I’m bad luck Ann-Marie. Everybody I ever been with…. I couldn’t protect ‘em.” I leaned my hand on Ruby as images of my mom and my dad and my sister and all of the groups I’d traveled with flooded my head.
“Who said anything about protecting me?” she cocked her eyebrow at me. “Besides, who’ll protect you?”
Before I could answer, Father Williams returned with my pack.
“If you’re going, you have to go now,” he said quickly, checking over his shoulder like Ted was gonna bust in any second.
“I’m goin’, but not yet,” I answered, pulling my pistol from my pack and sliding it into my pocket.
“Sadie, don’t do this. He’ll kill you,” Ann-Marie begged, grabbing onto my arm.
“Sure he won’t. I just gotta draw faster, right?” I said, gently taking her hand off my arm.
“You don’t get it. Ted cheats, he’ll draw on two or even one…. He’s not gonna give you a fair fight. Let’s just go before he—”
It was like a jinx. We spoke too much about him and like we’d called the devil, he was there in the doorway.
“You weren’t thinking of running, were you?” Ted asked as he stood in the doorway.
“‘Course not. Let’s settle this,” I said, following him out of the garage and into the street. It was so quiet that in the distance I could hear the groans of the outside troubles we tried so hard to hide from behind this rickety wall. The eyes of the whole town were on us as we approached Mr. Anderson. His normally rosy disposition had dissipated into a serious scowl.
“Before we start, Miss. Sadie, I’d like to say something,” he said, his gaze looking through me rather than at me. “We have tended to your wound, fed you, sheltered you, even offered you a place among us, and you repay us…repay me, by soiling the innocence of my only daughter. Let it be known that homosexuality of any kind is not tolerated in this town. We are a God-fearin’ people, and obviously, you are not. If it’s God’s will for you to win this duel, you are to leave immediately.”
“Trust me, I’ll be outta your hair as soon as we’re done here,” I said. “Now can we get this goin’?”
“Right,” Anderson said. “Rules are simple. Back to back, take three paces, and on the count of three, draw. Ready?”
“Yeah,” Ted said. He ran his hand anxiously over his gun. I looked over towards the church once more to see Father Williams and Ann-Marie. I wasn’t sure what they were doing, but Ann-Marie was saddling up onto Ruby while Father Williams held her lead. She looked like a little kid playing cowgirl with the black hat she’d bought me on and everything.
“Ready?” Anderson asked again.
I nodded. I knew I needed to focus on what I was doing if I was going to survive this, but a small part of me felt played. If Ann-Marie took off with my horse and all my shit, I guess it’d serve me right for trusting her so soon. Before I could give it another thought, I felt Ted’s back against mine.
“One.”
We both took one step forward. My palm sweat was making me worry I’d drop my gun before even getting a shot at winning.
“Tw—” Anderson didn’t even make out the rest of the word.
“Sadie, watch out!” Ann-Marie screamed. I whipped around as fast as I could, turning on my heels, pulled my pistol out and shot. In the dust of us both turning, I couldn’t even see where I shot, but it didn’t matter.
“You goddamn bitch! You cheatin’ little tramp!” Ted yelled in pain as Anderson ran over to him. I turned around to see Ann-Marie riding towards me.
“Hurry, get on,” she said, giving me a hand and helping me get on Ruby. I looped my arms around her waist as she charged towards the gate.
“What in the hell are you doin’?” I asked as I looked over my shoulder to see Anderson and Ted running after us.
“Saving you, what do you think?” she answered. A bang rang through the air as a bullet whizzed past my ear. Ted held his bleeding shoulder with one arm and shot with the other as Mr. Anderson ran to stop us. I pulled my pistol back out of my pocket and shot the ground in front of Ted. The fence was getting closer and closer as Jake climbed down from his post and struggled with the bolt.
“Don’t you dare open that gate!” Anderson yelled. “Ann-Marie Anderson, turn that horse around right this instant!”
I tried to get another shot out, but with the gallop and my bum arm, I knew I couldn’t guarantee that I wouldn’t shoot either of them. I closed my eyes as the gate got so close. All I could think about was Ruby running head first into it, probably breaking her neck and crippling her. But as I tensed up, waiting for the impact, I was shocked by nothing but the consistent gallop. Slowly I peeled my eyelids open, only to see the open desert once more. Looking back, I could see the gate closing and hear the growls of the men who were after us.
“Where to?” Ann-Marie asked, taking my hat off her head and sticking it on mine.
“Welp, I was thinkin’ about just takin’ you back home,” I started. I could feel her tense up against me as the words came out. “But, since it seems like you might not be welcome there anymore, it wouldn’t hurt to tell you my plan.”
She instantly relaxed, and in that sigh, I could’ve sworn I heard a thank you Jesus, but it was so faint that I’ll never know.
“I was headed north. Figured I could find some abandoned farm, build a wall, at least have somewhere to sleep at night,” I said.
“I thought you were a wandering kinda girl?” she said back.
“I am, but it’s good to have a home,” I answered.
And as we rode into the desert and the vision of Andersontown began to fade in the distance, I knew that maybe, with her, I could have just that.
Amber Palmer is a double major in Professional and Technical Writing and Theater Studies at Youngstown State University. While her writing focus is in playwriting, she also enjoys writing speculative fiction short stories. She intends on earning her MFA in playwriting after graduation.